Meanwhile on Planet Boob

Sometimes a comic artist really goes above and beyond when it comes to depicting the perfection that are boobs. Perfect orbs of perfect perfection they are, boobs. And it’s really cool when artists get them just right. Not every artist has the skill to give boobs the attention to detail they deserve, but in this column, we’re happy to spotlight the artists that totally know what they are drawing about when it comes to anatomy.

Humberto Ramos’ Supportive Black Cat

Black Cat crouches awkwardly
Black Cat Presents… (Amazing Spider-Man #650, Marvel Comics, February 2011)

The most obvious concern that this panel elicits is why Spider-Man would ever keep Black Cat waiting for hours like that. The pose might seem uncomfortable, especially if one had to hold it for hours, but here, Humberto Ramos shows off the versatility of boobs. A lot of people talk about boobs, especially big ones, needing support with special bras, but Ramos looks at boobs from a more practical perspective wherein they are actually supporting the woman. Here, you see that they have shifted into an elbow-like shape to help her maintain her posture of readiness. Malleable, yet still firm, this is a fine display of breast pragmatism.

Joe Madureira’s Beaten and Bedridden Psylocke

Get well soon, Psylocke… (Uncanny X-Men #330, Marvel Comics, March 1996)

Psylocke suffers a crushing defeat by Sabretooth and winds up in the hospital. Not sure why she thought she could ever beat a fine manly specimen like him in the first place when she’s so small and dainty, but here we are, with our resident hot ninja learning a painful lesson. Joe Madureira not only shows off his understanding of boobs but also exceptional medical knowledge. His attention to detail here is superb. Psylocke’s wounds are clearly extensive, but thankfully, Sabretooth was careful not to harm those precious orbs which means they can be kept free of oppressive bandages and allowed to breathe in a soft, weighted blanket in order to aid in the overall healing process while still creating that corset-like lift. Madureira acknowledges that sometimes boobs come in different sizes — even on the same woman [Editor’s Note: It’s true! Who knew??], thereby giving them a natural look and feel as the right boob edges over her arm due to its larger size.

Dave Gibbon’s Planetary Poetry

A giant orb with the Green Lantern symbol becomes a boob
You would cry too if it happened to boob… (Green Lantern Corps Volume 2 #5, DC Comics, December 2006)

Rounding out our column for this month is this touching homage to Watchmen by Watchmen’s own artist, Dave Gibbons. Gibbons truly captures the gravity that boobs carry when symbolically juxtaposing the panels of Gibbon’s perfectly spherical boobs with a giant planet. This is a fine example of how deeply comics imagery can capture the universality of breasts and the way everything revolves around them. People might die because of this poor Green Lantern’s failure, but they will at least die happy if their last image is one of celestial orbs like these.

Do you have a favourite panel that epitomizes the perfection of boobs? Share it with us on Twitter!

– Wendall La Manburg III