Earlier this week, Twitter user @yophoebs unearthed an awful article titled “How to Talk to a Woman Who is Wearing Headphones,” written by a definitely awful person named Dan Bacon, and from an equally awful website called “The Modern Man.” While the article is a few years old, it described an eerily familiar experience of harassment, but framed it as an opportunity for men to get dates.
During the discussion that followed, several people clarified how male privilege and entitlement function in this type of interaction; Martha Mills wrote a wonderfully snarky analysis of the article for The Guardian, Spike Trotman tweeted about why headphone-wearers respond politely for their own safety, Twitter user @kchamomile ripped apart the mythical “nice guy,” and Noelle Stevenson talked about how exhausting it is to have these conversations over and over again.
Each of these pieces is worth reading and sharing with your casually misogynist cousins on Facebook. However, in light of this shitstorm of an article, you may find yourself in need of a new playlist to drown out the Modern Men gesturing at you to take off your headphones. Don’t worry, we’ve got your back! I compiled a list of my ten favorite, super snarky tweets, and WWAC superstars Stephanie Tran and Melissa Brinks helped me match them to appropriate songs. You can get the full playlist on youtube here, but first enjoy the list in it’s entire glory, with accompanying tweets:
1. “I Bust the Windows Out Your Car,” by Jazmine Sullivan, and “Seven Devils” by Florence and the Machine.
2. “Stronger Than You,” by Rebecca Sugar (sung by Estelle), from Steven Universe.
How To Talk To A Woman When She Is The Immortal Living Avatar Of Lesbianism pic.twitter.com/fZuFFmWyWI
— natalie moore (@natalievmoore) August 30, 2016
3. “I Eat Boys Like You For Breakfast,” by Ida Maria.
How To Talk To A Clever Girl Who is About to Gleefully Eviscerate You pic.twitter.com/mVB4cJtHYu
— 🍍Junkyard Kate🍍 (@outofmyplanet) August 30, 2016
3. “Hey Mami,” by Sylvan Esso.
how to talk to a woman who keeps loudly repeating "please don't talk to me"
— Brandon B. (@drawbrandondraw) August 30, 2016
5. “Head Up High,” by Oh Land.
"How To Talk To A Girl After She's Hit You In The Head With Her Umbrella And Called The Police."
— Gail Simone (@GailSimone) August 30, 2016
6. “Castle,” by Halsey.
How To Talk To A Woman When She's Smiting Her Enemies in Righteous Battle While Consumed with Bloodlust. pic.twitter.com/FVHbqCRqUw
— Marjorie Liu (@marjoriemliu) August 30, 2016
7. “Demons,” by Sleigh Bells.
How To Talk To A Woman When She's The Black Earth Mother And Has A Skirt Of Human Arms And A Garland Of Human Skulls pic.twitter.com/3G7n5OqF1z
— Jess Nevins (@jessnevins) August 30, 2016
8. “Unstoppable,” by Santigold.
— Stephanie Tran (@YouAndYourEgo) August 30, 2016
9. “Alien She,” by Bikini Kill.
10. “Science Fiction, Double Feature,” covered by Jess Fink.
How To Talk To A Girl Who Changed Her Name, Faked Her Death, Built A Rocket Ship And Jettisoned Herself Into Space To Avoid You.
— Andrew Wheeler (@Wheeler) August 30, 2016
Which songs help you get through your commute? Share with us in the comments!