This Week In WWAC History: Date Night

WWAC Date Night Banner designed by Desiree Rodriguez

Last year, the WWAC staff geared up for Valentine’s Day by choosing any comic book character and showing us what a fantasy date night with that character might look like. How would your date night compare? I  know mine would be less of a date with a comic book character and more of choosing one to babysit the kids so I could actually go out on a date. The below articles are much more imaginative than I could ever be.

A Slice of Apple Pie, Date Night with WWAC, February 7, 2015,

panel from Thor and Loki The Tenth Realm #1, Jason Aaron, Al Ewing, Simone Bianchi, Lee Garbett, Nolan Woodard, Marvel Comics 2014Maybe there’s a universe somewhere, let’s call it Earth-1127, where I’m myself but somehow single. If Loki fell into that universe in his Agent of Asgard incarnation, he would be my dream Valentine’s date. He could cook me a nice dinner and then [imagine a sexy fanfic, but with good grammar and spelling].

 

Relaxing in that henley shirt, are you kidding me? I’m not made of stone, people.

But if a comic book character crossed over into THIS universe just in time for Valentine’s Day, I’d like it to be Steve Rogers. I’ve been happily married for 12 years and am not looking for outside romance, but we rarely do anything for Valentine’s Day and my husband won’t even be home until later that evening. But he’s awesome and wouldn’t care if I made dinner (and I’ve already established what I would make — that meatloaf is seriously the greatest) and had a nice evening’s conversation with Steve; there’s probably nobody Jeremy trusts more than me and Captain America. READ MORE

Valentine Vigilante, Date Night with WWACFebruary 8, 2015,

WWAC Date Night Banner designed by Desiree RodriguezJust like the prologue in Romeo and Juliet, I will state from the beginning that the relationship between myself and Batman is a doomed love. He’s a rich Gothamite and I’m a Torontonian who isn’t rich. Long distance may work in some rare cases, but given that Batman is super intense and serious about his mission against crime, I doubt my distance will be an incentive to drop everything, hop on a private jet, and woo me.

I’m cool with that. One date with the Dark Knight would be a wonderful, Hey-I-Did-This-Thing experience I’d tell my future kids.

For our date, I’d have Batman jet me to Gotham because duh, Gotham. We’d go for a nice nightly stroll (fully costumed in his cape and cowl of course), and we’d take in the sights of his city. We’d go “offenders watching,” which is like people watching, but instead we’d be watching officers drag handcuffed individuals into Gotham Police Department and guess which ones will likely escape later. READ MORE

Playing at Love by Starlight, Date Night with WWAC, February 9, 2015,

Should Chiba Mamoru (aka Tuxedo Mask) ever find himself in Toronto, I would definitely be selfless enough to take him round the city for a fun night. We’d start with Trivia Night at the Drake Hotel–the quiz would be a fun icebreaker for both of us quiet introverts. We’re also both of us voracious readers, so we could play off each other to answer all the questions and win first place. READ MORE

Hey Jude, Date Night with WWAC, February 9, 2015,

It never seemed strange to me to have crushes on fictional people. After all, I would argue that the majority of people who fall in love are only falling in love with their idea of the other person anyway.

Leaving behind my cynical views on relationships, I know that Osaki Nana and I were meant for each other. At least, I knew that when I was a pimply, mouth-breathing, greasy-haired preteen, so it still rings slightly true now. READ MORE

Double Trouble, Gotham vs. Riverdale, Date Night with WWAC, February 10, 2015,

I’m at the fanciest Italian restaurant in Riverdale (weirdly, I can also order lobster here). Across the table is my Valentine’s datehigh school heartthrob and continual teenage crush Jason Blossom.

No, wait. It’s no heartthrob at all, it’s everyman Archie Andrews, looking extra freckled and earnest in the kind glow of the candlelight.

I say, “Are you sure you don’t want to just split an appetizer?”

“Order the lobster!” he says, a little wildly. “I can pay for any of it!”

I realize he has probably sold his car to pay for this date. Just then, a light on my super-high-tech smart-watch flashes. “Sorry!” I say, standing abruptly and causing a small fire when the candle tips over after I bump the table. “Ladiespowderback in a sec!” Despite this being the third time I’ve left him for forty-five minutes under slim and shaky pretenses, he buys it once again. READ MORE

Rice, Spice, and Two Makes Nice, Date Night with WWAC, February 14, 2015,

Starfire, Koriand'r, Teen Titans, Marv Wolfman and George Pérez, DC ComicsI’ve been on a total of ten dates in my life. Which might seem like a lot, but considering they were all with the same guy in my senior year of high school probably not. I don’t often date; actually I never date. But in the face of six feet of tall, bronzed, and red head how can I resist?

I’ve had a crush on Koriand’r a.k.a. Starfire since I first saw her flying over the city in a bright red streak. She’s beautiful, even more so dressed fashionably in a purple halter dress with striped black heels. Her pupil-less eyes should be disconcerting, but there’s such a sense of warmth there you can’t help but feel at ease. Everything about her is warm, from her smile, to her skin when she picks me up as if I weigh nothingconsidering her super strength, I probably do weigh nothing to her as she whisks us off to the restaurant I’ve chosen.

It’s a quaint place, a local Spanish restaurant that serves the best arroz con gandules (rice and beans) in town. It has bright lighting and a slab of wood flooring near the back where a stage sits. A DJ is there now playing old Selena classics to set the dinner time mood. READ MORE

Barbarian Babe Brawl, Date Night with WWAC, February 11, 2015,

Let’s see? Would my date with Red Sonja be sexy-sex date, a cute romance date, or a friend date? Well, ideally, it would be all three!

The premise would begin with learning some self-defense and anti-heroics from Red Sonja (I mean who could a better choice for this?!). I would ask her to show me some basics in sword fighting. I mean I really want to learn this, but this is a great excuse to get closer to Red Sonja (provided she’s taken a bath), so win-win. She would wrap her arms around me as she demonstrates how to hold a broadsword properly. I would try to focus on the task at hand, because obviously I want to impress her, but it would be hard to ignore that I was that close to the She-devil with a Sword. READ MORE

Suck My Neck, Date Night with WWAC, February 13, 2015,

Cassidy, Preacher, Vertigo, DC ComicsCharacter: Cassidy, from Preacher

Date activities: Dinner and a gig

Decisions: Terrible

Dinner is burgers at a greasy diner (the best place in New York, he says, and he’s lived long enough to know). He gets a double, rarer than rareI can see the blood dripping down his chin. With someone like him, dinner is always in this general price range, but my God, it tastes amazing. I just have to try to avoid thinking about how terrible this food is for me and the gastrointestinal havoc it’ll wreak in the morning. It’s not a problem for him, of course. When your body doesn’t feel the strain of mortality, it doesn’t have to deal with pesky little things like arteriosclerosis.

Then it’s off to a basement bar, where a band who clearly wishes they were the Dead Kennedys is acting out that particular strain of aggression you only see in post-adolescents. We load up on Jack and Cokes for me and God knows how many beers for him; some overly friendly stranger gets us to join in a round of tequila shots. Pretty soon the band’s “Anti-Establishment Sentiment 101” doesn’t seem so ridiculous. When the lead singer screams “Fuck the pigs!” at us, we scream it back with something approaching sincerity. We’re still laughing at them, though. What grown person wouldn’t? READ MORE

Advanced Functionality, Date Night with WWAC, February 12, 2015,

I would probably date Nautica fromTransformers: More Than Meets the Eye, were she an actual existing person. She’s an adorable, well read, left leaning, politically minded, sweet purple lady that likes cats. Basically my girlfriend, if she was a giant robot that turned into a submersible vehicle and had engineering knowledge.

Obviously the first step to dating a giant robot lady is transferring your mind into an appropriately scaled gynoid bodyif that technology were available presumably the opposite would be as well, but why would you do that. READ MORE

Happy Date Night!

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Melinda Pierce

Melinda Pierce

Contributor for WWAC, mother of 2 mini-geeks, writer, and girl geek. Dreams of having enough time to write Veronica Mars fanfiction. @melindabpierce

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