I’ve Never…

I’ve Never…

Everyone's got one. A famous book they haven't read. A must-see movie they skipped over. WWAC staffers share their I've Nevers. What are yours? Lela I've never sat down with a group of friends and played an honest to goodness pen and paper RPG. The guys wouldn't let me play when I was in high

Everyone’s got one. A famous book they haven’t read. A must-see movie they skipped over. WWAC staffers share their I’ve Nevers. What are yours?


I’ve never sat down with a group of friends and played an honest to goodness pen and paper RPG.

The guys wouldn’t let me play when I was in high school and then my twenties happened and now there’s no one around to play with. I’ve played RPG video games. I understand the concepts, but I’ve never sat up into the wee hours of the night solving puzzles and fighting creatures and looting mausoleums as a chaotic neutral half-elf thief.

This pains me.


I’ve never played a pen and paper RPG either and I would love to! I never knew anyone growing up who was interested and to be honest, my interest didn’t start to blossom until recently. I met a friend of a friend who said he used to run horror RPGs and I asked if he could please set one up for us one night instead of our usual retro gaming night. That still has yet to happen but I’m hopeful. I would love to try a horror one.

I’ve never seen the original Star Trek series or movies. I don’t plan on watching it either because it isn’t my thing. I saw few episodes of The Next Generation because of my dad and that was enough for me. I haven’t seen Return of the Jedi although I’ve been meaning to since seeing A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back not that long ago.


I’ve never read The Master and Margarita. I’d never heard of it until I was eighteen, but then it started to come up everywhere. My sweetie read it and praised it. I kept seeing scenes from it on a blog that collected cartoonists’ illustrations of scenes from their favourite novels. It seems to be a book that can be enjoyed via pleasure in well-used language and exciting happenings, and I don’t know why I haven’t got to it except perhaps because I don’t want to forget how I imagine it now. Before The Fellowship of the Ring came out in cinemas, my mum had been suggesting I read Lord of the Rings for years–I had a VERY particular impression of what it must be like, which was completely wrong, and not favourable, but so vivid that I miss being able to remember that I thought it was. The film and my subsequent obsessive read and re-reads destroyed what I’d created through assumption.

I imagine The Master and Margarita to be something like Disney’s Hunchback of Notre Dame, which I have forgotten most of, animated like the Triplets of Belleville, but without all the yellow. I know there’s a big cat.

It’s not that I want to keep the impression for its own sake, I just don’t like to forget things I feel so accidentally sure of.


I’ve never seen Fargo. I’ve seen pretty much every other Coen Brothers movie (“Millers Crossing” being my favorite but dang did I love Inside Llewyn Davis), except, you know…the most famous one. Every time I’ve ever tried to watch it, I fall asleep within the first five minutes. Seriously, I think my body is now trained to immediately fall into a deep sleep the minute Fargo comes on. As a person who is something of a film geek, my lack of a Fargo viewing is kind of embarrassing. It’s also something that people repeatedly shame me for, which leads to me the conclusion that I may actually never watch it: not only do I feel it’s “too late” at this point (whatever that means), but also because I’m a terrible contrarian who will resist something more strongly the more often I’m told to watch it.


I’ve never seen the Godfather movies. Everything I know about them I’ve absorbed from pop culture–the horse head in the bed, “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse,” etc., but somehow I’ve never seen the real thing. Whenever they’re on TV it seems like it’s always AMC’s all-day Godfather marathons, but I never have a whole day to sit through them, and they somehow feel like those movies that need to be watched without commercial breaks or network censors cutting out the good bits.

Comics-wise, my shameful secret is that I’ve never read Maus. Even my middle-aged, otherwise never-touches-comics uncle has read Maus, but I haven’t. I’ve almost bought it a couple times, but given its subject matter I know it’ll be an immensely heavy read, and I inevitably wuss out.


I’ve never seen any of the Terminator movies. I’m sure they’re great – and Arnold Schwarzenegger is always good entertainment value – but for some reason they’ve never been on my list of things to do. It’s probably because they came out when I was a little kid and not into big robots. Someday I will find out what happens in both Terminators 1 and 2, and possibly even 3, but I intend never to watch Terminator 4, where in the grim darkness of the future there is only Christian Bale being even grimmer.

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