The Multiversity. Grant Morrison and his prize dolls hop from one DC universe to another, generating many strange adventures and also comic books. Team WWAC makes such a journey and finds a super-person in every universe. We’re reinventing the wheel, off-brand. You’re safe for now, Morrison.

Colleen:

Mine would be called “Magical Farm Boy Fly-Fly ©™®.”

Magical Farm Boy Fly-Fly©™® (MFBFF©™® for short) is a flying, magic boy from a farm who in no way is a direct replication of Superman© and/or any similar affiliated properties and as such is not actionable in a court of law. MFBFF©™® leaves home to work as a reporter in a the city of Citiopolis©™® and has a love interest named Rhonda Roundabout©™® and a nemesis named Longstanding Lawsuit©™®. The comic itself would only contain one page of actual comics and the rest would be advertisements for MFBFF©™® paraphernalia. What meager story exists is largely characters name-dropping product placement amended with legalese to avoid copyright infringement.

MFBFF©™® is identical to Superman© save for that his hair is parted the opposite way.

Definitely, totally, utterly not superman.

Claire:

I think mine would be a seven issue mini called “Star,” about Clara Kinton, a journalist with strong principles and a secret identity (Star). She’s afraid of violence, so Star flies her villains up into the atmosphere, or to somewhere really quiet, and buys them off. She can squeeze diamonds out of coal, right? “Relent, repent, and say I beat you upI’ll give you these diamonds, hush hush.”

She uses the super speed and flight and etc. to scoop everybody else and win all of the journalism awards, but is regularly arrested because she can’t/won’t punch through a wall to escape trespassing charges. At the end of the series, the world economy collapses because of too many diamonds. Clara is seen thirty years later receiving bread through the bars of the cell she was in when things went bad, dispensing the uncanny wisdom and advice she’s become renowned for. Her people are peaceful.

Ardo:

​Derrick Passive is a criminology student who was raised by kind and morally sound wolves in northern Ontario, Canada. Taking the morals that his Mama and Papa taught him, Passive goes back to civilization to find his birth parents. He finds out they’re normal and is bummed. One day he gets struck by a meteorite on the way to class that came from a planet that exploded (no survivors) and is granted powers.

He’s reasonably faster than a car. He can lift things half his weight.

He. Can’t. Fly.

Derrick Passive is Better Than Average Man (aka B-TAM). Using the knowledge of past research, he will stop the revolving door of the criminal justice system and truly seek justice (on a case by case basis because context matters)!

Al:

Raised by incredibly overbearing psychoanalyst parents, Marc Schmidt moves to Big City to work for Here They Are Now, a magazine that covers the mundane lives of rehabilitated musicians.

Upon swallowing a space rock that one of the musicians offers him, believing it’s ecstasy, Marc becomes entirely indestructible and more powerful than any weapon.

Quickly his already despondent nature becomes unbearably cynical due to the depressing quality of his job and how easy every task is for him. After helping every government and stopping crime by just thinking about justice, he finds that every day is a drag.

Mighty Siren is cancelled after one issue because readers are too bored to even complain about it.

Rachel:

Modern day immigrant story. Keep the idealism of the character while showing the crushing power of American’s legal system and how it treats people who aren’t in the ruling class. Superman’s supposed to be a socialist man of the peoplemake him that again.

Also, a trans Jimmy Olsen analog, because I’d rather do something deadly serious and respectful than crossdressing jokes regarding the character’s disguise kit.

Ginnis:

Texas ranchers, Ed and Janie Marshall, stumble across a strange space capsule in their oil field. In it, they discover a baby. They name him Cleetus and quickly realize his “gifts” which include the ability to lift tractors, spit chewing tobacco so hard it’s lethal, and to spin himself into a tornado. He learns the hardworking values of ranch life which consist of opening doors for women and volunteering for border security. One day on border patrol, he meets a beautiful young immigrant named Luisa Lopez. Torn between the beliefs he has grown up with and his love for this young woman, he confesses his love. She tells him to go to hell, because she is the hero of this goddamn story. She then moves to Austin to lobby and write about immigration issues for Texas Monthly.