Furious 7 debuts on April 3rd. SO SOON, my goodness. In honour of this momentous occasion, please join me, from March 28 to April 2nd, for a nightly Fast and Furious livetweet and feelsfest.

I’ll be tweeting out from @womenoncomics using the hashtag #7daysfurious. You will be tweeting back, possibly crying, definitely clapping, enjoying car racing, car stunts, car wrecks, car explosions, and cars themselves. Also the various humans who are a part of the vast.

This is our itinerary:


1. Saturday, March 28, 8PM EST

The Fast and the Furious

Director: Rob Cohen
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster
PG-13, 106 min

Rookie-ish cop Brian goes undercover as a street racer, in pursuit of information on a gang of daring truck-jackers, believed to be a part of the LA race scene (cause they’re driving is so good). Once inside, he falls for the Toretto siblings, Mia and Dominic. Together, they teach Brian the true meaning of family, fastness, and furiousity. What will happen when the Torettos find out their new friend is a cop!?


2fast2furious2. Sunday, March 29, 8PM EST

2 Fast 2 Furious

Director: John Singleton
Starring: Paul Walker, Tyrese Gibson, Eva Mendes
PG-13, 107 min

After the events of The Fast and the Furious, Brian went on a long drive cross country, ending up in Florida. He buys an ugly houseboat and spends his nights out racing, flirting with cute girls, and pining over the Torettos until FBI Agent Bilkens taps him to go undercover again, this time with a drug lord. He takes the opportunity to have his childhood BFF released from prison so they can drive together. Fast and furious hijinks ensue.


fastandfurious3. Monday, March 30, 8PM EST

Fast & Furious

Director: Justin Lin
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez, Jon Ortiz, Gal Gadot
PG-13, 107 min

Brian’s an FBI agent, Dom’s a criminal on the lam, and Letty’s a confidential information. Oh, how things have changed. Once again Brian goes undercover, this time as a street racer/drug mule with a Mexican cartel, and who should he be reacquainted with on the inside? His old pal Dominic Toretto. Will they team up in pursuit of  fast and furious street justice or will Dom glare Brian to death with his furious eyes?


fastfive4. Tuesday, March 31, 8PM EST

Fast Five

Director: Justin Lin
Starring:  Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, Jordana Brewster
PG-13, 130 min

Bust Dom out of jail? Check. Go on the lam in Brazil? Check. Infuriate local kingpin? Check, check, check. It’s business as furious in Fast Five, with wrestler turned FBI Agent Hobbs (ha ha, not really) in pursuit, as the team plan a complicated, car-centric heist, achieves much street justice, and drinks many Coronas.


fastandfurious65. Wednesday, April 1, 8PM EST

Furious 6

Director: Justin Lin
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster
PG-13, 130 min

The crew is living like monarchs in Europe, when Hobbs swings by to offer them amnesty and a chance to return home. IF and only IF they drive fast, drive furious, and take down a crew of mercenary nogoodnicks. Of course Dom, Brian, Mia, and friends jump at the chance. Hijinks before health, is their motto. Coronas before cures, if you will. Fast before furious; furious at all feds.


tokyodrift6. Thursday, April 2, 8PM EST

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

Director: Justin Lin
Starring: Lucas Black, Sung Kang
PG-13, 104 min

Sean Boswell pulls a Brian, doofing up his life with legal troubles over street racing, he flees to Tokyo… where he takes up street racing. The scene in Tokyo, though, is all about drifting, not explosions of unlikely speed (sorry NOS, our long time friend), and Sean’s got to learn how to race all over again. Good thing Han is there to help.


betterlucktomorrowHomework – to be completed on your own, at any point during or before this wonderful marathon:

Better Luck Tomorrow

Director: Justin Lin
Starring: Parry Shen, Jason Tobin, Sung Kang

Super-smart high school students gone bad! In this unofficial prequel to The Fast and the Furious, we meet baby Han for the first time, and experience the teen version of fast furiousity. A bunch of bored, over-achieving high school students are so bored they pursue a life of crime. Seems reasonable.

If you can’t make it out to see Furious 7 on opening night, I suggest you watch Better Luck Tomorrow in its stead.


furious77. Friday, April 3, at a movie theatre of your choosing

Furious 7

Director: James Wan
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, Michelle Rodriguez, Jason Statham

*screams into a pillow*